An anachronistic martinet RSM on a remote Colonial African army caught in a local coup d'etat must use his experience to defend those in his care.

Ace crime reporter Watling tries to discover the identity of a notorious jewel thief, but his informant is murdered. At a house party, Watling helps detective Adam expose the criminal.

Bernie is a silver tongued wanderer with a fondness for drink and no clear goal in life. What was supposed to be a day of fun at the seaside turns to dust as he drinks his way through a seaside resort community, trailing his little niece Winnie.

John Lewis is bored of his job and his wife. Then Liz, wife of a local councillor, sets her sights on him. But this is risky stuff in a Welsh valleys town - if he and Liz ever manage to consummate their affair, that is.

Sir James Bond is called back out of retirement to stop SMERSH. In order to trick SMERSH, James thinks up the ultimate plan - that every agent will be named 'James Bond'. One of the Bonds, whose real name is Evelyn Tremble is sent to take on Le Chiffre in a game of baccarat, but all the Bonds get more than they can handle.

A struggling female soprano finds work playing a male female impersonator, but it complicates her personal life.