A bank robber seeks refuge in a desert gas station run by nuns, awaiting her boyfriend's release. An alien meteorite transforms her into a flesh-craving monster with a monstrous tongue, while her poodles become drag queens.

Rene is a dedicated warrior-monk of the famed Knights Templar, a religious order whose mission to protect Christian pilgrims has degenerated into a power grab for wealth and influence in the Crusader Kingdom. Disillusioned by the corrupt motives of his superiors, Rene is nearly killed at the disastrous 1187 battle fought at the Horns of Hattin, which wipes out most of the Christian army. He is taken captive on the battlefield by brigands, but escapes and flees into the desert. Saved from starvation by Hasan, a mysterious Muslim traveler, he returns the favor when Hasan is attacked by outriders of Saladin's army. The two take refuge in an isolated oasis, the home of Soheila, widow of a Muslim warrior, and Soheila nurses the severely wounded Hasan back to health.
While he waits for Hasan's injuries to heal, Rene finds himself tempted by the simple pleasures of a life free from the ravages of war. His growing attraction for Soheila, followed by news of the atrocities committed by both the Christian and Muslim armies, lead him to question his vows of chastity and obedience and his commitment to the Crusader ethos. But the secret that Hasan harbors brings down on the little oasis the wrath of Saladin's forces, igniting a confrontation that has devastating consequences -- consequences which finally hold the answers for his troubled soul. -- © Official Site