Alex is the definition of loser. He has no, nor has he ever had, friends. His life has no direction and he has a stupid haircut. While attending the Venice Beach Art School, he meets Lizzy, Patrick and Gnome, who become his friends. When Alex figures out he should make a movie, he decides to do an "alternative political documentary in black and white" about Gnomes struggle to free Hawaii. He hires some brain dead film students and meets the girl of his dreams and he's all ready to make his movie. Until the first scheduled shooting date when Gnome, who has the budget, turns up missing.

Phil the Alien crashes to Earth and find himself alone in the wilds of northern Canada. In the process of going home he goes from drunk to christian rock singer to mass murder.

The film follows a petty rock band called the Winners, consisting of vocalist Joey Winner, bassist Jennifer, guitarist Tyler, drummer Sam, and French-Canadian roadie Hugo, along with their sleazy manager Jeff, as they tour across Canada and the USA after Jennifer is turned into a vampire by Queeny. Meanwhile, a vampire hunter who is afraid of the dark named Eddie Van Helsing quickly chases them down.