solidarity

Hi everyone,

For those of you who haven't followed my soap opera-like existence here on the Fediwebs, my partner, our co-dependent border collie and I have unfortunately had to rely on the community here to survive, thanks to our chronic mental health challenges.

I've also made several expensive financial mistakes lately trying to prioritize which of our ongoing monetary crises; the most simple of which is I felt embarrassed fundraising non-stop and procrastinated too long, costing us steep, unnecessary fees.

The total amount of the aforementioned fees was a bit of a slap in the face that seems to have finally gotten through my thick head.

So.. we owe $1210 at the time of this writing which is due by August 14th and instead of waiting until the last moment, for once I am being proactive and starting this right away.

My sincere apologies that we've had to constantly begpost lately.

My plan is to try and raise this as soon as possible and then move immediately to working on September's total and have that in place *before* the end of the month.

By that point, we're hoping and praying that my partner will have new employment by then that doesn't constantly trigger his PTSD, and/or I find a second job.. or potentially go back to school. Or something. (Onlyfans maybe? lol) Because things are clearly not fucking working as they are currently.

I know many (most) of you are understandably sick and tired of seeing our begposts. My friends, please don't give up on us yet. I swear we're trying our best, meager as those efforts may be.

If you're willing AND able, please boost and if possible donate. If you can't donate, *do NOT feel guilty* for being in the same boat as us. Your feelings about it are valid but rest assured you needn't feel bad.

Venmo: https://venmo.com/thegizmotwins
Cashapp: https://cash.app/$thegizmotwins
PP: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/gizmo1982
GFM: https://gofund.me/12171be3

#Solidarity #BPD #PTSD #Poverty #MentalIllness @mutualaid

Folks, every time I write these I keep hoping it's the last time we'll ever need to engage in digital begging, yet here I am again like a broken record.

This month has been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster. Interestingly, I'm just realizing that the "ups" of said rollercoaster mostly coincide with having money to live (making rent, buying groceries, our nifty new scooters that I absolutely adore) and while I know correlation doesn't equal causation, it is certainly a lot of curious coincidences.

It is also worthy of note that every one of those save for maybe groceries were given to us through people's donations. Our friends here on Mastodon and the Fediverse are who keep the roof over our head and the lights on.

My partner and I are barely able to earn enough money to eat, and not much more. My weekly hours at my retail job haven't been completely sufficient but they at least seem to be holding steady.

On the other hand, I'm very, very proud of my partner for adapting to public transit (despite the its anxiety-provoking nature for him, on top of some sort of PTSD-triggering aspect that is so deeply ingrained that he can't really tell me about it) for getting to work due to our car being out of commission.

Said car will likely remain that way for the foreseeable future due to my not being as active about fundraising for it as I should have been; and now that it's the last week of the month, I need to set our focus on staying housed.

Anyway.. I've only got about two hours before I need to leave for my soul-crushing retail job, where I work myself so ragged I can barely function on my days off, yet I'm not even getting full-time hours and frankly I don't know if I physically *could* do full-time right now.

Ugh. I'm so exhausted. Fucking mental illness, my friends.. it poisons everything. I literally can't afford it.

Long story short: We need help. Yet again.

If you're willing AND able, please boost and if possible donate. If you can't donate, *do NOT feel guilty* for being in the same boat as us. Your feelings about it are valid but rest assured you needn't feel bad.

Venmo: https://venmo.com/thegizmotwins
Cashapp: https://cash.app/$thegizmotwins
PP: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/gizmo1982
GFM: https://gofund.me/12171be3

#Solidarity #BPD #PTSD #Poverty #MentalIllness @mutualaid

UPDATE: As I mentioned in another post, my partner just landed a job and they're having him start *today*! But it'll be a few weeks before he starts to see the income from it.. which means we definitely need to try and get this covered in the meantime because the sooner we do that, the sooner he can stop stressing over it and focus on adjusting to brand-new employment again. Thank you everyone!

============================================

Hello Pocket Friends,

I sincerely apologize for back-to-back-to-back fundraising, but this month *seems* to have finally gotten the message into my brain that maybe waiting until the last second on these things is the wrong way to go about it.

Accordingly, I am going to attempt to do something that I'm.. not really sure I've *ever* done before: pay rent *before* the first of the month, instead of the last possible moment before late fees are assessed (or later.. 🙄)

While I truly wish we were able to accomplish this on our own, unfortunately we aren't yet in the position to do so; therefore despite the fact that we have just raised monumental sums of money for this month's rent and my car fiasco, I am trying to learn from these mistakes and be proactive by starting to begpost *now*, instead of in two weeks when it's already past the due date.

I understand and sympathize if you're getting begpost fatigue from us. I promise we're trying our best to get back on our feet. I want to be the one helping others, instead of always being the ones needing help.

Will that ever happen? I hope so. Dear god I hope so.

My dear Fedi friends, we can't thank you enough for keeping us going, for not giving up on us (even when we're ready to give up on ourselves), and for motivating us to become better, more compassionate people. We have a long, long ways to go but at least we're finally beginning that journey.

We are deeply grateful for everything you do for us, folks. We seriously couldn't make it without you. 🙏

If you're willing AND able, please boost and if possible donate. If you can't donate, *PLEASE DO NOT FEEL GUILTY* for being in the same boat as us. Your feelings about it are valid but rest assured you needn't feel bad.

Venmo: https://venmo.com/thegizmotwins
Cashapp: https://cash.app/$thegizmotwins
PP: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/gizmo1982
GFM: https://gofund.me/12171be3

#Solidarity #BPD #PTSD #Poverty #MentalIllness #MutualAid @mutualaid